21.12.10

What is Fitness?


Funny how the pegs seem to FIT the holes, huh?


Funny how the cheetah seems evolved or designed to FIT the function of hunting that antelope - and how that antelope seems evolved or designed to eat grass and be alert and run fast.


The pegs fit down the holes. The grass fits down the gullet of the antelope fits down the gullet of the cheetah. Humans fit that crazy ill-defined thing called "Life" - but not very well unless you do CrossFit and get a general education or equivalent and work a little at getting good at life. You don't really know exactly what's gonna happen. You might have some idea - if you train to be a firefighter and get a job as a firefighter you can be fairly decently sure that you're probably gonna run the risk of dealing with a fire sometime in your life. The rest of us might. Or might not.

Same thing with war. Accidents. Emergencies. Having to wrestle an alligator or fight zombies (hey, it could happen!) or kill a rampaging gorilla to save your children. Or decipher whether the girl wants you to tell her the truth or wants you to just tell her she doesn't look fat in those jeans. Or get the TPS reports in on time and manage to sneak from the cubicle to the exit without aggroing your boss so you end up working the weekend again.

You get the point.

CrossFit the corporation defines fitness as Endurance, Stamina, Strength, Speed, Coordination, Accuracy, Flexibility, Agility, Balance. Sort of. They call it the "Ten General Physical Skills". 

Aye, for there's the rub. 

That's all physical. Personally I don't think you're really "FIT" for that nebulous and ill-defined and sort of unknown and unknowable thing called "Life" represented by the scribble above, if you're just good at those ten general physical skills.

I'd say add languages to that. That means You, there, American. Learn a foreign language and open up a whole new world of learning and possibilities and job opportunities and people you can make friends with. Add social skills. Add basic emergency medicine skills. Add basic knowledge about engineering and mechanical stuff. Add wilderness and urban survival skills. Add fighting skills. Add weapons and improvised weapon skills. Add motor vehicle skills - both cars, defensive driving, light trucks and maybe basic, light motorcycles, too. Basic cultural knowledge to make sure you don't just barge in in a different cultural setting and make it near impossible to get your job or objective done because you just insulted the hell out of the locals by offering your left hand or not removing your shoes or by talking with your eyes hidden behind sunglasses, or showing the bottom of your soles to the host.

Add being halfway good at kissing. Add social etiquette and how to dress appropriately and put together a decent set of clothes with not much money. Add how to fix those clothes in a jam. Add water survival skills. Add changing a busted tire on both your bicycle and your car. Add how to stay warm in a snow storm. How to build an igloo. How to get fresh water from a tarp when you're adrift in a little boat on the ocean. How to search the internet for answers. How to avoid getting angry at people who seem hell-bent on getting a reaction out of you on the internet (hiya, trolls and haters!). How to keep your kid from seeing things on the internet that you didn't even know existed. How to find a date in a new city. How to quickly and easily give directions to either a man or a woman, and how to find your way using a map and a compass. Or without a map.

How to build things. How to destroy things. How to deliver a baby. How to make that baby. How to make a reasonably successful relationship. How to deal with the fact that that relationship just didn't work out and now there's a house and money and kids involved. How to plan ahead. How to be impulsive and have fun. How to make some sort of art or creative something happen. How to entertain a kid with a minimum of effort. How to deal with friends who are suicidal or use drugs. How to say No. How to deal with being a victim of a crime. How to deal with crazy people who may or may not be telling the truth. How to spot a potential fight and make it NOT happen, whether that's your and your significant other in the privacy of your house or in a club or a restaurant with some drunken fool. How to be a gentleman or a lady and how to know and what to do when it's time for the gloves to come off and do whatever it takes to stay alive and get the job done. How to argue for what you feel or know is right, even when it's tempting to use questionable methods like torture to get what you want.

You'll probably be in an accident some time in your life. You'll probably see someone get hurt. You'll probably be dealing with people who don't speak your language (okay, maybe not if you live in northern North America and don't plan on going anywhere). You'll probably have to deal with taxes. And someone dying. And your parents getting old. Might as well get ready for it.

High time you took this whole "CrossFit" mentality and applied it to the rest of your life, in my humble opinion. Like, learn to swim at least. And if you're a CrossFit Trainer and don't know basic CPR and First Aid, you're just plain wrong. You don't have to get an EMT-B certification, though that wouldn't hurt. Just know the basics about most everything, and a lot about something.

Edit:
How to cook a beautiful meal for that beautiful someone that just showed up.
How to cook for yourself taking no more than 5min per meal so you can get back to finding a job or write articles for CrossFit Journal.
How to handle the in-laws.
How to deal with a psychotic ex-girlfriend.
How to get a psychotic ex-girlfriend if that's what you want.
How to spell things correctly. How to be the kind of person who can not get upset at other people when they do things that used to drive you nuts; like, use the wrong, punctuation.
How to face your fears.
How to deal with injuries or disability.
How to find a job when you get laid off or too injured to continue.
How to deal with authority figures like police even when they're in the wrong or corrupt.
How to not get so drunk that you make really bad decisions like getting behind the wheel of a car or in bed with the really wrong person.
How to know when it's time to cut your losses.
How to spot fallacies like the Gambler's Fallacy and avoid caring so much about the result of an endeavour that you miss the warning-signs of a storm blowing up the side of Mt. Everest that'll cost you and five others' their lives one horrible night in 1996.
How to avoid caring so much about a person that you smother them and bug them constantly and screw it all up - and when it's time to drop the rule book because this one person is the most important anything or anyone in your entire life.

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